Scary Stories Treasury – A Man Who Lived in Leeds

Read Time:5 Minute, 10 Second

A Man Who Lived in Leeds Kitty: ⭐ Winterjoy: ⭐

Greetings! Thank you for visiting! We are on week 5 of our Super Cool Scary Stories Book Club Thing. This time, we are visiting A Man Who Lived in Leeds. If you’d like to start at the beginning (it’s a very good place to start), you can visit the first story in the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark story here.

A Man Who Lived in Leeds

Some say this rhyme doesn’t mean anything. Others are not so sure.

There was a man who lived in Leeds,

He filled his garden full of seeds.

And when the seeds began to grow,

It was like a garden filled with snow.

But when the snow began to melt,

It was like a ship without a belt.

And when the ship began to sail,

It was like a bird without a tail.

And when the bird began to fly,

It was like an eagle in the sky.

And when the sky began to roar,

It was like a lion at my door.

(Now drop your voice.)

And when the door began to crack,

It was like a penknife in my back.

And when my back began to bleed—-

(Turn out any lights.)

I was dead, dead, dead indeed!

(Jump at your friends and scream.)

“AAAAAAAAAAAH!”

*~*~*~*~*~*

Schwartz had originally was told this story in 1975 by a man named Tom O’Brien in San Francisco. Mr. O’Brien had heard it around the turn of the century, and was first told it by his grandfather who was an Englishman.

It took some digging to find the parallel source sited by Alvin Schwartz for this poem. The source says ‘Blakesborough, p. 258’. The problem is…. there is no Blakesborough!

I finally realized that Blakesborough is a misspelling of the name Blakeborough, which points to Richard Blakeborough, who was a prominent folklorist from the late 19th, early 20th century.

The Blakeborough source comes from a book entitled Wit, Character, Folklore and Customs of the North Riding of Yorkshire (1913). Blakeborough has some interesting things to say about the poem:

“Perhaps some student will work out the meaning and application of the following; it is beyond me. An old servant of ours was taught it by her grandmother:—”

After telling us the poem, he goes on to write,

“I remember, when this doggerel was repeated, we all sat round the kitchen fire, the maid sitting by the table with her hand near the lighted candle; towards the last few lines her voice would drop, until, on repeating the last line, it almost became a whisper. With ears strained, and eyes nearly out of our heads, we awaited the dramatic dénouement, which most of us well knew; but in those days the excitement never waned, always the same intensity of feeling was duly worked up, as she repeated in a hoarse whisper, ‘dead, dead, dead indeed,’ extinguishing the light, as she uttered the last syllable with a fearful shriek, whilst we all yelled in one mighty chorus. Houses in those days were built, not held together by the tacks in the carpets and the paper on the wall; such a yell as we gave would have shaken the ornaments from off every bracket nailed to the walls of a whole row of modern blown-together domiciles.”

It is important to note that when Blakeborough uses the word ‘doggerel’ here, he is not using it as a slam. He is using it in the context of, to put it in Merriam-Webster dictionary’s words, “comic verse composed in irregular rhythm.”

For an official retelling from the audio-book of Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, listen here. It’s worth listening to, because the laugh/scream at the end is just so hilarious. I was laughing with tears in my eyes.

Now it’s review time!

Kitty

In what environment did you read the story? Sitting at the computer with the book on my lap.
Do you remember having read this story as a kid? Yes, but I cared more about the stories than the songs or poems in the books.
Analyze the actions of the characters in the story. Did they make sense? Would you have done anything differently? I think as soon as the melted snow turned into a ship, I’d be calling for help right away. This is not normal. If I had stayed out of curiosity, I’d totally be gone if I thought a lion was at my door.
Which was your favorite and least favorite character and why? The Leeds man, because he stayed when he thought a lion was at his door.
What did you think of the storytelling style? It was fine, not my favorite.
Examine the art for the story. What are your thoughts on it? Pretty lazy, actually. A dripping bird or a dripping lion… even a dripping ship would make more sense than what was drawn here.
Your overall rating and why: ⭐ because it makes no sense, and I think they just needed words to rhyme with.

Winterjoy

In what environment did you read the story? On the floor of my apartment with the A/C blasting.
Do you remember having read this story as a kid? Nope!
Analyze the actions of the characters in the story. Did they make sense? Would you have done anything differently? The sole action of the man filling his garden with seeds seems pretty rational and fine.
Which was your favorite and least favorite character and why? My favorite character is the Leeds man for planting seeds and helping the earth. My least favorite character is the Leeds man for planting seeds that turned into a penknife.
What did you think of the storytelling style? The poetry wasn’t too poetry-y so it suited me.
Examine the art for the story. What are your thoughts on it? I loved the artwork. The clash of black and white in the sky is very foreboding. The drops forming in the sky to resemble blood dripping is very cool. Love how it does seem to resemble rain when it hits the ground.
Your overall rating and why: ⭐ and not 0 for the artwork